Monday, June 19, 2006
What makes me have this sudden change on myself? I felt that everything does not go to the way that I want it to be. The whole day I was staying a home. I had pondered on a lot of stuffs and I realized that nothing is impossible. It’s just that whether you want it or not.
Perhaps I need to have a good chat to let off all my unhappiness stuffs that had hide in my heart. Hope it’s like the wind that blown away so that I will not face so problems at a go. I had a lot to say but I just could not know how to start. Maybe this is why some of my friends say that I’m too dependent of myself. Always put everything in my heart and refuses to let any of my friends know what I am thinking at this time. Some may think that I’m too stubborn, always believe that I can do it all by myself without any of my friends’ help. This is me, Joyce; I can’t stop myself from thinking in this manner.
Even if I want to say, I doubt all my friends will want to listen. They are busy working, studying or we had already suddenly become stranger so it’s impossible for me to give them a ring to tell them all my problems. Don’t ask me to find a boyfriend as I don’t believe there will have a guy who will will to listen to all my woes and sorrow. I don’t want to have a boyfriend now as this is not what I want at this stage. You can say it’s very common to have a boyfriend but that does not mean that I must have a boyfriend.
It’s up to the individual to want to have. Have you wonder why some people can find a boyfriend so fast within a few months of schooling but others take years or even go to chat room to find one?
I don’t know how they managed to find and I don’t want to know the reason. I just want to be myself. I don’t want to change because of others and this will not be me, Joyce anymore. I don’t care how others see me, whether they think I being stubborn or what, I just don’t give a darn about it. So please stop asking me to change just because you don’t like the way I behave. Anyway, this is none of your business so why do you care so much. If you are unhappy with the way I behave you can jolly well not be friends with me, I won’t be bother whether I had lost a friend like you. Stop asking me to change to the character or the person that you like. This will not be Joyce anymore. You are just treating me like a substitute.
Joyce is Joyce, she will not change foe the sake of others. If you don’t like the way she react, then don’t make friend with her.
I’m sleepy so I shall stop here. Friends please don’t ask me what is happening to me. I don’t want to tell so please respect my decision. Take care my friends. Good night everybody.
Joyce shine on ::2:20 PM::
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~